November 2005
5 posts
one forty six pm.
Jay: “What are you sauteing this in?”
Dad: “Olive oil.”
(moments later)
Dad: “Did you put more olive oil in here?”
Jay: “No.”
Dad: “Did you mean to?”
Jay: “No.”
Dad: “Why did you ask me that question?”
Jay: “Okay, stop talking.”
“Everything we drink is different and separate.”
(to...
the indians in the lobby.
Happy Thanksgiving.
12:23pm
My father is going off the fucking deep end. Him talking:
“Why do I want to cook Thanksgiving dinner? I’m out of my fucking mind! Are these all the radishes I brought? You should be doing this. Fuck, give me a fucking beer. Why does this happen?”
(minutes later)
“Nothing like cereal and beer.”
(at the stove)
“WHY...
exit wound in a foreign nation.
DEAR NEW YORK TIMES DELIVERY PERSON:
How can you possibly think that if it is raining all fricking day, it’s a good idea to leave my sunday paper on the driveway, UNPROTECTED FROM THE ELEMENTS, with a HOLE in the bag? WITH THE HOLE FACING UP? TOWARDS THE RAIN?
HOW IS THIS PROGRESS? You know I hate the bag. I hate it AND YOU that much more when it AND YOU fail me.
This type of action...
working undercover for the man.
there's a little phrase called too much...
So this writer is sitting on the toilet at work. Reading, etc.
Painting a word picture here. Imagery is key. Consider yourself warned.
Now, I really can’t recreate the thought process that led to this, but what is the thing that I absolutely must do at this point? I take off my watch. Now, why would I do this? No effin clue.
I’m reading. I’m crapping. Obviously, I...